The Mighty Grace of God

In the gospel of Matthew, chapter twenty, Jesus tells "The Parable of the Workers in the Vineyard." The link below will take you to a website if you'd like to read it. Also, I will be referencing

http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=matthew%2020:1-16&version=31

Also, I will reference a blog post from September 15 entitled "Never Too Late." It too is about a parable taught by Jesus. Here is the link for that blog post.

http://equippedforbattle.blogspot.com/2008/09/never-too-late.html


Here's the parable in a nutshell. One day there was a landowner who went to hire some workers. Early in the morning he went and hired some men, and promised to pay them a denarius (or a day's wages) for their work. So they accepted and worked for him all day long.


Hours later, the landowner went out again and found workers standing around with nothing to do. So he hired them also, and promised to pay them what was right. Again and again, the landowner went out throughout the day and found people with no work. He sent them into his fields and promised to pay them what was right. He even went out with only one hour left in the work day and found people with no work, sending them into his fields.


At the end of the day he gathered them and paid them for their work, starting with the men hired last. He gave them a denarius, and likewise to the rest of the workers who were hired after the initial workers. When the landowner got to the workers who had been there from the beginning, they expected to get paid more, but likewise got a denarius.


When they didn't get paid more they were offended, but the landowner answered one of them, "Friend, I am not being unfair to you. Didn't you agree to work for a denarius? Take your pay and go. I want to give the man who was hired last the same as I gave you. Don't I have the right to do what I want with my own money? Or are you envious because I am generous?"


This story reminds me of the story of the prodigal son. The brother who didn't run away grumbled because the prodigal son was received so warmly; the brother was angry because his father prepared a feast for the son who squandered his inheritance. But the brother missed the point; the lost brother has returned! The son had come back to be a part of the family!


Likewise, the first workers missed the point. They had been doing the work since the beginning, and others joined them as the day went. Some even worked one hour, but the landowner all paid them one denarius. They all received the same generous blessing.


So what right have I to be envious when a prodigal turns back, or when a new brother receives much or more than I have (as if I'm a good judge of that anyways...).


This speaks of the Lord's generosity. And! He has a great heart of compassion. The last workers "deserved" far less money for their work, but the Lord gave them both the work they needed and the money for it. When Jesus fed the five thousand, he did it because they had need. He healed people because they had great need of it. He is a God of compassion and generosity.


And notice, the landowner keeps finding people doing nothing and sending them to work for him. Even with one hour left in the day, he hires more workers. This tells me, just like in the story of the prodigal son, it is never too late. If there's still hours in the day, or days remaining in life, there is still time to serve the Lord. And! The Lord is a great God, filled with generosity and compassion, and you can still reap a great reward.


What keeps us from His rewards is thinking it's too late. "I've already missed out on most of the day... how could I find work now? Would it even be worth it now?"


Keep your eyes peeled; though you may not be actively pursuing the Lord, that doesn't keep Him from coming to you. Even when the prime hours of the day are spent, and you've nothing to show for it, the Lord may come and call on you to do work in His fields. If you have a mindset of, "It's too late now," or, "What's the point? What could I possibly earn in one measly hour," then you will not be able to receive in full what could be yours.


It is never too late. And the compassion and generosity of the Lord extends to and covers even the last hour of the day. This is the mighty God we serve, and that is His mighty grace at work.

Christmas Traditions

If Nancy Drew lived in my house, each year we'd have "the case of the missing wardrobes." Of course, it'd be a boring mystery because everyone in my family would know exactly where they went - under the tree.

That's right, every year at Christmas time a good chunk of my clothes disappear and are opened on Christmas morning. In the mind of us McConnell boys, it doesn't matter whatsoever how small the gift is. However, it still needs an adequate box to be wrapped up in (for the sake of ripping off the paper and making a mess to clean up afterwards). And where else can you find an abundance of box stuffers than your own closet?

I just got done wrapping my brothers present, wrapped carefully in two t-shirts and placed inside a cheerios box. And not the small cheerios box either; it was one of the biggies (thus, it required two shirts). Just think about it... how fun is it to open a present if you can shake it and have an inkling of an idea of what's inside? We prefer to surprise and be surprised if we can help it.

On top of the fact that a big chunk of my wardrobe will be missing by the time I finish wrapping the remainder of my presents, there is another mystery that always occurs at Christmas time - "the case of the missing boxes."

If there's a box, and you need it, the philosophy is put the contents in a tupperware and use the box. Ritz crackers, cereal, oatmeal packets, you name it - we'll find a suitable place for the contents of a box if we think it's just what we need. Remember that cheerios box? I just emptied it's contents into a cereal tupperware container. (the ladies may be thinking "that poor mother..." but she hasn't killed us yet for it!!)

Here's the great thing about this Christmas... It will be my last Christmas at home :) Next year, Hannah and I will have our first Christmas together, and begin our own Christmas traditions. So this year, I will empty my wardrobe to soundproof the boxes, and empty the box of hot chocolate mix to wrap my last present... But as for next year, who knows! I just know that I cannot wait to spend my first Christmas with Hannah as we begin our lives together. And the traditions that come from that will be the dearest to me, even more so than trying to remember if my favorite t-shirt is in the wash or under the tree.

Well, I hope your Christmas is blessed and very enjoyable! I'm going to get back to hunting boxes and wrapping presents before I head to work...

Dr. Gene Sapp

This morning I woke up at a decent hour, and began my day. Somewhere around eight thirty, my father invited me to breakfast with him at IHOP (International House of Pancakes, you gotta love pancakes...). Of course, I accepted - breakfast is the best meal of the day!

As we were heading out the door I got a phone call... it was my dentist. I had forgotten my eight o'clock appointment! I had left myself notes about it, and remembered it even yesterday... just not last night when I set my alarm... Thankfully we were able to reschedule my appointment for as soon as I got there, which meant rescheduling breakfast for later.

(But that's okay - lunch may not be as good as breakfast, but it still stops the rumbly in my tumbly)

I've been going to the same dentist since I was a wee child; his name is Dr. Gene Sapp. I've had many blessed memories... like when he was pulling one of my teeth, and accidentally crushed it. Before you think "OUCH!!!!...", just let me assure you my tooth was quite dead - its root was just still deeply embedded in my gum, and it refused to let go. The nerves were non-functional and completely, utterly, and totally dead; but it's still kinda scary when a tooth is crushed into three pieces in your mouth.

In addition to fun memories, the same lady has been cleaning my teeth there for ever since I can remember. When I was young, I just remember her cleaning my teeth, applying the flouride, and saying "bla bla bla bla..." the whole time. But as I've gotten older, I've learned that she is both a mother and grandmother; I've learned about her involvement in her church. And she has likewise gotten to know about me, such as what I'm studying in college, ect...

And of course, when the dentist comes in to check over everything, he has always had a smile, wit, and laughter. He was a family man, who took good care of his wife and children. He was very involved in their lives, and I always looked forward to the end of the visits when he'd come in.

Today was the first time in a dentist's office where Dr Sapp has not been there. Just last month he went on to be with the Lord after a fight with cancer. He was a man who loved his family, and his patients. His legacy still goes on, and the dental hygienists who work under him still carry that warm personality that characterized him. I do miss him, but in all aspects of his life, his testimony echoed strongly of his love for his family, for people, and for the the Lord.

When I started writing this blog, I hadn't meant to write a 'eulogy.' I wanted to write about the importance of relationships, and I did just that, I think. I know his family will never doubt that he loved them. And people who knew him would never doubt it either. If there's anything in life I sure don't want to miss out on, besides walking daily with my Lord, I do not want to miss out on the opportunities to build relationships with people. They are of greatest value, for both this life and the next.

And I truly believe what I'm about to say... If anyone has neglected relationships in their lives, it is never too late. It might take some work, or a lot of work depending on the situation, but I truly believe any relationship can be restored by the power of God. It may take sacrifice, but the blessings that come from it would be far greater than anything else you'd find on this earth. Treasure people, you will never regret it.

My Brother, Jimmy

Last night I had a neat encounter with an individual named Jimmy. I was on break at work, and walked outside when I noticed a homeless man sitting on the patio. After some internal struggling, I began a conversation with this man.

To be honest, I must have looked nervous, because his first words were, "Sir, I haven't done anything wrong!" (I was wearing a white button-up, or button-down, shirt with tie) So I had to quickly let him know I wasn't kicking him off the patio; I just wanted to talk. Actually, I wanted to talk to him about Jesus.

As it turns out, this man knew Christ, and loved the Lord deeply with all of his heart. It was a joy to spend my break and both of us talk about the Lord, and talk about the upcoming generation. His heart was for the upcoming generation to have the scales off their eyes, that they might see the Lord, that they might turns around and get some sense.

This is a brief description, but though I didn't share the message of the cross with him, that's all we talked about. Even though my purpose was to witness to him, instead we both were edified and enjoyed fifteen minutes chatting on the patio.

To be honest, it seems each and every time I am prompted to witness to someone, they end up already knowing the Lord. But that doesn't make it wasted opportunities. Other times I've had the blessing of still sharing and shining some light, and even just encouraging others to share the gospel with others. And I'm so glad I did stop and talk to this man, because we were both encouraged and joyful by the time we had to part.

I have no idea if this will keep happening everytime; I hope to get to share the blessed truth of the gospel with someone who doesn't already know the Lord, but I sure enjoy each and every time I run into a brother in Christ. Every time it has been a tremendous blessing for me - I hope to run into Jimmy again.

Something to Celebrate

It's always fun when it comes to the end of the semester. You've worked your tail off the whole year, and you work off your tail for the final exams. And just like many precious things, they only last but a moment. Thankfully they've come and gone, and I did alright. I passed with flying colors, and was very excited when I finally got the results. (I had to wait a full week after one exam before the professor finally posted my final grade for the class... oh the impatience of me...)

And there's more to celebrate still. The Charkosky's (sp?) were able to bring their beautiful baby to church today - she's precious. All the women-folk were very anxious to see her and hold her. To be honest, I myself can't wait to get to hold her either, but I may just have to wait a while for my turn :)

And yet more to be thankful for and celebrate. Technology is such a blessing. Normally in order for Joe Ewen to be able to minister to the body, he has to fly all the way across the Atlantic from Scotland to see us. But thanks to technology and skype, he was able to pray over people in front of his computer, and thereby encourage and edify the body. God is just that big, to minister to people when the man of God praying for them is across the ocean. What a mighty God we serve!

I'm going to stop here for the day, but there's so much in life worth celebrating. There's so much to be thankful for, and I hope everyone is able to see all the wonderful things in life amidst the hard times. So what if it's cold outside; so what if it's cloudy and gloomy this winter. How else are we going to get the snow we all hope for?

Are You Washed in the Blood?

Here is a wonderful song that has been on my heart lately. There have been other great "gospel classics" that have been on my heart, such as Glory to His Name, but this one has especially been lingering in the air. Here's the words.

Are You Washed in the Blood?

Verse 1:
Have you been to Jesus for the cleasing pow'r?
Are you washed in the blood of the Lamb?
Are you fully trusting in His grace this hour?
Are you washed in the blood of the Lamb?

Chorus:
Are you washed in the blood,
In the soul-cleansing blood of the Lamb?
Are you garments spotless? Are they white as snow?
Are you washed in the blood of the Lamb?

Verse 2:
Are you walking daily by the Savior's side?
Are you washed in the blood of the Lamb?
Do you rest each moment in the Crucified?
Are you washed in the blood of the Lamb?

(Chorus)

Verse 3:
When the Bridegroom cometh will your robes be white?
Are you washed in the blood of the Lamb?
Will your soul be ready for the mansions bright
And be washed in the blood of the Lamb?

(Chorus)

Verse 4:
Lay aside the garments that are stained with sin
And be washed in the blood of the Lamb;
There's a fountain flowing for the soul unclean,
O be washed in the blood of the Lamb.

(Chorus)


======

These words are powerful to me. The all-important question for us is simply, "Are you washed in the blood of the Lamb?" There's nothing more important, and there's no other way for our souls to be cleansed. It's only by the blood of Jesus that we can be made clean.

And for us who answer, "Yes, I have been washed in the blood of Jesus," are we fully trusting in His grace? Are we walking daily with Jesus? Have we laid aside those garments that are stained with sin and taken His spotless robes?

If we can't answer this question with certainty, we need to figure out why. When the Bridegroom comes, if we are not dressed in His spotless robes the Lord says that we will be bound hand and foot and tossed into darkness. The Lord has given us opportunity to accept Him as Lord; He has given us opportunity to place our faith in His death on the cross for our sins, and that is the only way to be made clean. Are you washed in the blood?

The Lord says, "That if you confess with your mouth, 'Jesus is Lord,' and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved. As the Scripture says, 'Anyone who trusts in him will never be put to shame.' For there is no difference between Jew and Gentile—the same Lord is Lord of all and richly blesses all who call on him, for, 'Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.'" (Romans 10:9-13)

A Quote for the Day

Here is a quote from one of those "flippy" calandars with verses and quotes...


"There is a serene and settled majesty to woodland scenery that enters into the soul and delights and elevates it, and fills it with noble inclinations."
-Washington Irving

"Acts of Righteousness"

A while back as I was reading, I had a little revelation. And by that I mean just this, I gained some understanding and insight. Jesus in the gospel of Matthew taught about fasting; likewise, in Isaiah 58 the Lord reveals what kind of fasting is acceptable/unacceptable to Him. So between those two places, we learn some things...


First off, I am not a spiritual giant if I fast. Jesus plainly spoke, saying, "When you fast..." He wasn't trying to get a bunch of people to start doing the right thing; he wasn't trying to persuade the people to begin a spiritual habit of fasting. He simply said (paraphrasing), "when you fast, here's what it should and shouldn't look like." So if we fast, then we're walking in obedience to what we're already expected to be doing. So if we fast, awesome! We will reap the blessings of obedience. If not, maybe we're missing something.


Secondly, Jesus talks about fasting in the midst of discussing both prayer and giving to the needy. All three of these things are to be done in secret; Jesus says in Matthew 6:1, "Be careful not to do your 'acts of righteousness' before men, to be seen by them. If you do, you will have no reward from your Father in heaven." But if we do it unto Him, He says "...your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you."


So when Jesus (directly afterwards) tells us to store up our treasures in heaven, and not on earth, we can get a glimpse of where our treasures lie by our "acts of righteousness." If we can't do them for the sake of obeying the Father, and doing it to please Him, we have no reward; there is no treasure in it. But if we keep our "acts of righteousness" in the secret, without letting our right hand know what the left hand is doing, God will reward us and we can know where our treasures truly are.


Also, look at Isaiah 58. The Lord is far less concerned about the "acts of righteousness" than He is about the heart of the person doing it. Israel cried out, "we have humbled ourselves! But why haven't you recognized it?" What did the Lord have to say about it? He rebuked them for their strife and anger with others; he rebuked them for exploiting workers; he rebuked them for not taking care of the poor and needy; he rebuked them for letting people go hungry; he rebuked them because the naked were not being clothed; he rebuked them because they didn't loose the chains of injustice and set the oppressed free...


The Lord had much to say. He also said, "Is this the kind of fast I have chosen, only a day for a man to humble himself? ... Is that what you call a fast, a day acceptable to the LORD?" It's much like Samuel when he rebuked Saul...
"Does the LORD delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices
as much as in obeying the voice of the LORD ?
To obey is better than sacrifice,
and to heed is better than the fat of rams.

For rebellion is like the sin of divination,
and arrogance like the evil of idolatry.
Because you have rejected the word of the LORD,
he has rejected you as king."


We so often get caught up in our "acts of righteousness" but fail to do the things we've already been told to do. When a day of fasting is filled with fights and anger, it shows us our true self. Maybe we're not humbling ourselves under the mighty hand of God like we think we are. I know I can be way too "Justin-focused" at times to be of any use to anyone else. But praise the Lord there is hope for me!


When I turn and obey what I should be doing; when I turn my focus off of a "day of fasting" or some other "act of righteousness" and turn my focus to the Lord, I have this promise from the end of Isaiah 58...

"Then your light will break forth like the dawn,
and your healing will quickly appear;
then your righteousness will go before you,
and the glory of the LORD will be your rear guard.

Then you will call, and the LORD will answer;
you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I.
"If you do away with the yoke of oppression,
with the pointing finger and malicious talk,

and if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry
and satisfy the needs of the oppressed,
then your light will rise in the darkness,
and your night will become like the noonday.

The LORD will guide you always;
he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land
and will strengthen your frame.
You will be like a well-watered garden,
like a spring whose waters never fail.

Your people will rebuild the ancient ruins
and will raise up the age-old foundations;
you will be called Repairer of Broken Walls,
Restorer of Streets with Dwellings.

If you keep your feet from breaking the Sabbath
and from doing as you please on my holy day,
if you call the Sabbath a delight
and the LORD's holy day honorable,
and if you honor it by not going your own way
and not doing as you please or speaking idle words,

then you will find your joy in the LORD,
and I will cause you to ride on the heights of the land
and to feast on the inheritance of your father Jacob."
The mouth of the LORD has spoken."

Almost Two Weeks Later

Tomorrow will make two weeks from the day I asked Hannah to marry me (and I'll say it again... she said YES). Since that day, it has been a blast telling everyone I can think of about it. The story of November the eighth has not grown one bit boring to me in my mind at all. Every detail about that day still amazes me (including the details of the proposal... that was a blast!).

In the process of telling everyone, I've had all sorts of responses. There are those who are way too happy for their own good about it (and I love that response lol), those who say "congrats, I hope it works out" (and it will!), and the people who don't seem to know what to say.

And the fun part about this process is this... You find out how many people really love you. Now, I'm not shallow and saying that if someone gets more excited, they love you more. But I do know for a fact that all over the place both Hannah and I have been blessed with people in the family, church, workplace, and more offering to do things for us. So many people are willing to serve in whatever capacity in order to make the process easier for us.

It's actually humbling, to know how many people love you and are willing to go the extra mile (or extra miles) in order to have a great and stress-free start to married life.

To all you people, I say thank you! Hannah is the one person in this world who means everything to me, and this whole spectrum of people who celebrate with us make it more feasible to enjoy this season of planning and preparing for that blessed day.

Faith and a Notepad

Just in case you don't know, I teach the middle schoolers once a month (along with Hannah and Roger). We have a blast down there, enjoying fellowship and learning together from the Word of God. There's never a dull moment!

I know lately both Hannah and I have encouraged the students to begin forming good habits such as taking notes to help them take hold of truths. Each week I tell them they need to bring their Bible to church, and that through the week they should be reading it, getting familiar with it...

All the students downstairs are great - they love the Lord and they love each other, and they're very well behaved (and respectful of authority!). I'm impressed by their concern for the lost at their young age... I could go on, but I think the point is made. The middle school class is a great bunch of believers!

But last week something amazing happened! One of the middle schoolers brought a tiny notepad and took some notes. The notes written down were the same thing twice - "holy means set apart." And that was it. No great elaborate notes of my eloquent speeches and descriptions (that's joke, by the way lol). It was just an effort made towards taking notes.

Here's why this amazed me so much this week. I believe those scribbles on the notepad weren't fruitless, but the birthing of faith. The authority in those students' lives are their parents, but they look to us teachers down their as an authority to a degree. And this student of whom I speak has taken the words of teachers who have been alive longer and began to put them into practice. Maybe it's not grandiose, but it's a start!

To you, it may not seem like much. But for a young person to take those words of someone "above them," and begin to act on them (whether or not they see the point of it), is a birthing of faith. A life of faith isn't one that is above authority, but properly understands the authority that God places in your life.

Now I'm not suggesting that if I say something, then the students are obligated to do it. But this student is trusting that someone wiser, who has already passed through middle school, may have insight and understanding that he or she doesn't. And this is a perfect place to begin walking by faith, and to keep walking in faith.

So I will continue to encourage the students to do this this, and if by faith this student continues to do this, I am certain that the Lord will bless her for it. By the way, this student of whom I speak is none other than Abby!

I love all the students down there, but last week this stood out to me above anything else that happened. They all love the Lord, and I just pray that they will be faithful to keep walking in faith and growing in the Lord. The Lord has great things planned for them - I can't wait to see what the Lord is going to do in all their hearts this year.

I am the Happiest Man Alive!

Yes, I am the happiest man alive. I just had the best weekend of my life. After the most wonderful fourteen months of my life, I asked Hannah to be my wife (and to all the smart-alecs in the world... she said YES!). She is by far the greatest thing that has ever happened to me, and I get to keep her all the rest of my days.

We've both been so blessed. The Lord has blessed us so tremendously along the journey. The Lord even was so awesome to help me with the process of asking. I wanted nothing less than to be able to honor her and let her know how much I loved her. So I made plans, and made plans, and there were some kinks that just wouldn't get worked out. I struggled and struggled to finish out the plans, but it was the Lord who guided me to the perfect idea.

So I can't take too much credit, if any at all. He's been at work amidst our relationship to shape us, and cares about us enough to work wonderfully in the whole process.

I have found more than a good thing; I've found the best thing. And I agree with all the people who have told me that "I am marrying up"! :)

I couldn't be happier; we couldn't be happier. It seems too amazing to be reality, and all we seem to be able to do is rejoice in the Lord and praise Him, and thank Him for His many blessings. Some of these blessings include both sides of the family who are rejoicing along side us, and another one of these blessings is a church full of people who are rejoicing with us.

The Lord has been so good to us. I apologize if I linger in the clouds for a couple of ... years, but I'm just ecstatic beyond belief.

And if you want to see the ring on the lovely hand of the future Mrs. Justin McConnell, there are pictures at http://www.plantedandrootedinchrist.blogspot.com, my future wife's blog, and also at http://www.aseasonofharvest.blogspot.com, my future mother-in-law's blog.

Thanks for rejoicing with us!

Do I Realize the Authority of Jesus?

I've been reading through Matthew, and there have been many intriguing things that have been sinking into my heart which I hope to write on. But today I just want to take note of the authority of Jesus; His position of authority.

After the sermon on the mount, Jesus heals a man with leprosy first thing. The man obviously recognizes Jesus' position of authority, because he kneels before the Lord, addresses Him as lord, and makes his request humbly. "Lord, if you are willing, you can make me clean."

It's like going before a king to ask for something (and in this case, the King of kings). Praise the Lord we can come before the throne boldly and with confidence to ask, but I hope we don't forget who we're approaching. I don't want to come before my King irreverently, just on the basis of boldness and confidence. Though I am at peace before my King, He is the ruler of all, and may I not forget it.

And now back to the man with leprosy... The Lord's response was simply, "I am willing, be clean!" He touched the man, and immediately this man was healed. Just a few words, and it was just as He said. This was the case in the next man in Matthew recorded approaching Jesus.

A centurion approached the Lord as He entered Capernaum, and asked for the Lord to heal His servant. But when the Lord offers to go see the servant and heal him, the centurion also addresses Jesus as lord, acknowledging that he is not worthy to even have Jesus under his roof. And this is what the centurion says...

"Lord, I do not deserve to have you come under my roof. But just say the word, and my servant will be healed. For I myself am a man under authority, with soldiers under me. I tell this one, 'Go,' and he goes; and that one, 'Come,' and he comes. I say to my servant, 'Do this,' and he does it."

Wow, now that's faith! In fact, Jesus says He hadn't found faith like that in all of Israel. How could the centurion have the faith to just trust in the word of the Lord to accomplish his request? The centurion understood the authority of Jesus. The centurion was given authority from his master to rule over those under him. Likewise, Jesus had been given authority from the Father. And if the Lord says it, it will be done as He says because of the authority given to Him by the Father.

So how does that apply to me? Do I really understand Jesus' place of authority? Both the man with leprosy and the centurion obviously did; it is evidenced in how the approached the Lord. And they both trusted that from His position of authority, He could accomplish what they asked. The centurion didn't even need to see it with his eyes. He knew if Jesus said it, it would be done. Do I have the faith that takes Jesus at His word, whether or not I can see it being fulfilled? Do I have a proper understanding of His authority, so that I can take His word and recognize it as reality?

I may not be all the way there; who in this life is perfect? But if the Lord says it, it is so. When He says He will take care of all our needs, I can bank on Him meeting all my needs. And the Lord wants us to have the kind of faith to be like the centurion. He didn't see the healing of his servant until he walked all the way back home. I believe it's in Isaiah where it says that the word of the Lord does not return empty. We have His promises, and if we really understood His authority... if we truly saw that the Lord is the One on the throne... we could walk in faith knowing that when we arrive, our servant will be healed. We can walk in faith knowing that the Lord will meet our every need, even before we see the need met. And by His grace, I will walk in that faith to the glory of God.

Praise the Lord! Thank you Jesus for your promises.

Wow, Time Flies By

I just realized it's been two weeks since I've sat down and written anything. Rest assured, if anyone is checking, I'll have something up again soon (just not now...).

Well, while I'm here, I'll leave a quick something. (Amy, Rachel, please forgive me)

I don't remember which of the twins was there (I know, I know, I'm a horrible person...), but one of them while we were praying felt the Lord saying we just needed to lay down our pride and just worship the Lord.

I know in my own heart, I've been struggling in the humility department lately. So if no one else needed a reminder, I know I could take it and say "amen." And yet, I still found myself in opposition at points. There were things that I just couldn't in humility just let go of, in a sense. It was a struggle.

My point, though it is very brief, is that other people's responses don't determine your own. Amy or Rachel (again, sorry!!) heard from the Lord, and it was right on! But even though my heart wasn't found in full surrender to it by the end of the night, she has no need to feel discouraged or disheartened. And neither do I when someone refuses to hear reason or wisdom, or the Word of God.

The Lord is pleased when I as an individual do the Father's will. Other people's responses aren't as important. Jesus did exactly what the Father told Him, and He was hated and despised for it. Some accepted His words, but in the end He was killed for it. Look at Micaiah in 1 Kings chapter 22. He was thrown in prison for speaking the Word of the Lord. There were many many many other prophets saying what the king wanted to hear, but Micaiah said it plainly. The king refused to hear, and died because he would not hear the Word of the Lord.

I would say more, but classes call. I hope to say more later. The Lord is pleased by obedience, not response by others. If you proclaim the Word of God, and obey it yourself, the Lord is well pleased, for that is the will of God.

Later!

The Fight of My Life

In high school I was a busy man; heck, I still feel like a busy man. Back in the day, though, every single day of my life was run, run, run, and go, go, go. I was involved with sports, and I wanted to be involved in every little thing that happened with friends after school. When you're young, these things don't seem to bug you as much (I know, I know... I'm still very young). I was free from responsibilities for the most part; the only thing I had to worry about was doing my homework and having some fun.

My senior year in high school was probably the coolest overall, just because I was able to go on an overseas trip to Italy and Spain. But before we would embark on that trip, we had the basketball season to finish up.

The last game of the year was going to be against one of our big rivals: Maryville Apostolic. We were especially looking forward to it. Earlier in the season they had beat us, barely; it wasn't going to happen again. But the game before (or perhaps two games before...) had an untimely fate for me. There I was... chasing a loose rebound when it happened... a rather large player on the other team tripped and fell into my leg, which sent me to the floor with a broken leg. This injury left me unable to finish the season, forcing me to painfully watch the remaining game(s).

Later upon review, it was proven on tape that this player tripped over a teammate of mine (thanks Deryk...).

Shortly thereafter, I left for Spain. My pink cast was off my leg (oh yeah, I forgot to mention that detail earlier...), but I was still required to wear a walking cast for the vast majority of the trip. As a rambunctious teenager, I did not like the change of pace. I was used to being able to run around without cares of what was going on around me; I didn't want this constraint. So after much frustration, I decided to ask the Lord what He was trying to teach me. What was that? "Slow down."

And over four years later, I'm still trying to maintain that perspective. For me it is a hard thing; as a college kid, I get up and drive across town to school. If I work, I head straight from school to work. There's little time to sit down and relax. But I still need to "slow down" and have time to take care of things. I need to "slow down" and spend time with the Lord. I need to "slow down" so that I can be sensitive to His voice throughout the day.

It wasn't easy then, and it wasn't easy now. But my trip to Spain was much better just because I couldn't do as much. I was forced to rest; my favorite part was going on top of the roof alone with my guitar and just singing songs to the Lord at night. That was birthed from my having to slow down.

And I still need that desperately. If I'm running and gunning, not only do physical things fall apart (like my bedroom, yikes!), but spiritually too. Without a healthy balance, nothing can be maintained. Relationships, cleaning, responsibilities... they all take time. And the only way to take care of them is to "slow down."

And, in my opinion, slowing down is the best way to get the most out of things. You can rush through a chapter of a book to let you "read more," or you can slowly make your way through it, enjoying and retaining what you've read. Doing more does not mean you're enjoying more. Most of the best times I've enjoyed with Hannah haven't been due to lots of activity; rather, when we're relaxed, there's a spontaneity that seems to arise that let's whatever situation we're in become delightful to us. And it seems whenever we've been worried about having enough "us" time have been filled with some fun arguments and lots of stress.

So, I'm still in the battle. I have slowed down, but I'm still learning on how to balance things properly. There's school, work, relationships, responsibilities, ect... and all of them require my time. But worry doesn't help anything; it will likely lead to stress. Doing nothing sure won't fix anything either; then nothing would change. Somewhere in the middle is that blessed place that I'm in the process of finding, and maintaining. And perhaps simplicity is just where I'll find that answer. In fact, I'm getting to be pretty sure of it. Actually, I am sure that simplicity is the key.

Simplicity in thinking, simplicity in planning, simplicity... I will "slow down." And I will enjoy every aspect of life all the more for it.

The Aftermath of a Word Well Aimed

Sunday I had the pleasure of working downstairs teaching the middle schoolers. It was lots of fun. My favorite part might have been when I asked if they remembered what Lewis Burke had talked about the previous week. They said, and I quote, "Um... I think it begins with a 'C'"

The only problem is, I don't remember a 'C' word. I remember the words pray, intercession, praise, standing in the gap for others, Joseph, Judah, but I do not not remember a 'C' word. But it was a great time nonetheless being encouraged by a bunch of young people who love the Lord.

Since I was downstairs, I was not able to hear Randy Reid's message until I got a copy of it on cd. I listened to it intently; in fact I listened to it twice. Even Pastor Tim's comments afterwards spoke to me. In fact, something he said hit me hard and I knew if there was no one else who needed to hear it, I was the one God was targeting.

I believe the comment was something like this... "Some people are so worried about things that they begin to plan on doing this if this happens, and doing that if that happens, trying to plan everything out. It's like playing chess with life!..."

And wouldn't you know it, the Lord was about to let me see this one in action in my life.

A situation arose last night. I was re-reading my papers regarding the application process to the education program (I'm not officially in yet, but by the end of the year they'll have one more male educator for their list!). One phrase stuck out to me, and panic sunk in. Fear that all the slots would be filled up before my application was turned in struck me harder than I would have imagined.

I went to God with it, telling Him I was going to trust Him with it. I asked the Lord to help me trust Him with it and give it to Him. Even then, I couldn't stop panicking for the life of me. So I did what any man would do; start drawing up plans on how I could persuade them to interview me if in fact all the spaces were filled. Then I would recall the words "playing chess with life" and give up on that mindset... or at least until panic struck me again.

The end of the story is sweet. The temptation to worry kept coming back over and over again. I wish I could say that it was vanquished and put away with, but all I seemed to be able to do was hang on by the skin of my teeth. But when I arrived to turn in my application, not only was there still space for me, but there was only one other person who had applied thus far in math education. In fact, they were going to have to cut a full time-slot on one day because there are so few looking into math education.

I felt sheepish.

But it reminded me of my 'theme verse' for this blog. Judges 3:2 "... he did this ... to teach warefare to the descendants of the Israelites who had not had previous battle experience..." The Israelites didn't walk into a promised land that had been emptied of trials and battles. In fact, the Lord purposefully left some nations so that the younger generations would be able to gain battle experience. He leaves things not to make our lives difficult, but so that we can be trained. The trials and battles will expose where we truly are, so that we can see where we need training.

I wish my trust in the Lord would have been stronger. It would have been much nicer (in my opinion) to have walked through that (very) short trial with all confidence in the Lord's provision, but I stumbled. So a weakness has been revealed, and the Lord has proved Himself faithful. Again, it has been made clear that there is absolute no need of worry or fear on my part. I am the Lord's. I am doing what He has called me to do. He will take care of me.

Walking into the promised land doesn't mean you or I will never be confronted with difficulties or trials. Rather, when the Lord is leading us, we'll find that He is aiming to build us up in the areas we are weak.

My Joy in not Knowing

I must confess something - I tend to be the type to like things planned out. I like knowing what lies around the corner. Knowing when things are going to happen and why things happen is how my brain naturally tends to process things. I've also found myself having to break that, and I've found joy in it.

Whenever the Lord has told me to do this, or to give up that, you name it, I've always tried to figure it out and ascribe a reason to it in that moment. The problem with that mindset was this; I didn't always know why. Knowing why gave me a sense of security; it gave my obedience an extra sense of purpose. But the Lord has been breaking that, and I can honestly say I'm different than I used to be. It's sure not like I'm perfect about it, but I'm unable to carry how I used to.

The important thing when the Lord tells me to do something isn't that I understand why. The natural man wants to know why. Knowing why is an element of control. But the Lord doesn't always reveal the reasons up front. I'm not even sure if He will always tell us why. And the spiritual man is OK with this, because the spiritual man is submitted to the will of the Lord Jesus. The spiritual man is not dependent on knowing the reasons why; the spiritual person knows whom he has placed his trust in: the Lord Jesus Christ.

How does this bring me joy? Namely, I'm not wavering in my commitment based upon my understanding of the situation. If my commitment is secure in Him alone and knowing that He has called me to something, I can set my mind to that alone.

Last summer the Lord asked me to give up something, to which I ascribed a reason for it. I'm certain that reason was part of it, but the Lord wasn't checking if I could ascribe some reason to his mandate. The Lord wanted me to commit myself to Him and obey Him with all my heart, mind, soul, and strength. And here's the kicker for me... Even though I had both the knowledge of what He has asked of me, and even had a reason for doing it, I was not able to be faithful to it. My "understanding" of the plan of God did not "enhance" my obedience or make it "easier." It just made me feel better about doing it.

But now (by the grace of God) am walking differently than I used to. I'm completely comfortable with saying the Lord told me to give this up, or to do this, without knowing the reason.

And though I can't guarantee myself that I will always know the why, I believe the Lord isn't about keeping us in the dark. Jesus said "I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master's business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you(John 15:15." I am the Lord's servant, but I also know that He makes known the business of the Father to us. It might not be revealed to me in the beginning of a situation or season, but I do believe if we're faithful to obey then the Lord will have something to reveal to us.

And letting these things rest in His hands has brought me joy. In releasing my need to know things, the Lord has brought freedom. This freedom will allow me to rest other things in His hands and live in more freedom; this I do know.

Most people won't understand obedience without a good, solid reason for doing it. But for the child of God, it means everything.

This is Love...

It's amazing how complicated we make things. So many truths are so plain and simple, and the freedom is in its simplicity. For example, I was making my way through 1 John last week and I came across this verse. "This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins."

I don't know how many books exist about what love is. And I'm not sure how many sermons or Sunday school lessons pertaining to love. All I know is I've heard a lot of stuff.

Lately I've been wrestling through the whole thing of love and obedience. To clarify, I'm not second-guessing my need to obey the Lord. I'm not questioning how love and obedience go hand-in-hand when walking with the Lord. I've just been finding myself in a place of thinking... "I'm so imperfect! How could I love God?"

"This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins."

But since I've been saved, I've slipped up and screwed up so many times. I can't seem to stay on my feet long enough to take the next step, let alone think about where I'm heading...

"This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins."

But... but... I find myself with so many but's, and all I keep finding is grace, grace, and more grace. I never earned my salvation; I'm unable to maintain it. After all, Jesus is "the author and perfecter of our faith..." So the fact that I'm a screw up doesn't disqualify me from anything. It's because I'm a screw up and a sinner that I needed Him in the first place. And I still need Him; I need Him desperately. I need and want to be changed into His image. But let me not forget...

"This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins."

I'm sure I've got more screw ups ahead of me; I think it's a part of that whole humanity thing... But I will remind myself whenever the enemy comes against me, that it all started with Jesus. It will be sustained in Him; it will be perfected in Him. I can rest in His love, because I know my love for Him exists only because He loved me first. "But God demonstrated His love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us."

And I will remind myself, and hold to that truth... I will cling to it. My life depends on it. Not understanding this, or rather, not holding to it left me in despair and condemnation.

I have much more need to understand the grace of God. And each time some of it is revealed to me, I will cling to it. I need it.

And if you are wanting to read some more concerning the grace of God, my friend Sheila has written some about it in her blog "A Season of Harvest." There should be a link on this page... There's nothing quite like freedom, and I can't wait to be freer still.

Changing Colors, Changing Temperatures, Lack of Desperation

Note: If my blog were really cool, I'd put a picture of my trees on it. The leaves were green last week, but now they're all sorts of delightful colors. Reds and yellows are overtaking the greens, and I like it.

And now, regarding the change in weather; the changing of seasons...

My (perhaps) favorite part is the change in temperature. I've been waiting for the summer-like temperatures to drop. I've grown tired of working up a sweat whilewalking up and down "The Hill" on campus everyday. I have been so ready. Sure enough, in the blink of an eye, we went from really warm at night to dropping into the mid 40's.

Note: I am glad the weather changed rapidly. It reminds me that I am, in fact, attending the University of Tennessee and Knoxville, and the weather is simply and wonderfully unpredictable. In fact, next week it could be in the nineties for all I know...

If I were more cold-natured than I am, this would drastically affect me. I head out to school semi-early each morning; thus, it used to be warm, and now it is cold in the wee hours of the a.m. In spite of this change, I still waltzed out to my car in a t-shirt and long pants, with sandals.

Now, had I been aware of the change, I may have dressed differently. Maybe I would have grabbed a jacket. I was desperately looking forward to this moment in the season, but I'm not sure I was ready for it. Meaning, I wasn't watching out for it like I think I should have.

If I would have been "desperately looking forward to this moment," like I claim, you'd expect to see me watching and waiting. And then, when that moment arrives, I'd jump on it. If I would have been "desperately looking forward to this moment," wouldn't it make sense that I should appear to be pursuing it?

Desperation is something I find I'm lacking in, whether physical or spiritual. I'm not sitting here condemning myself or anything, but I am going to confess I've found my "pursuit of God" to be less than pursuit. If I am looking forward to a break-through in an area, I don't think I'm anticipating it as much as I think I am. Otherwise, I'd be trying to reach it faster, rather than letting it hit me. Or, if it is out of my control, I'd at least be watching and waiting for it, so that when it comes into view I can run after it as hard as I can.

So I love the changes that have been occurring in Knoxville. Now, all there is to do is to make something of my recent revelation. Rather than sitting and waiting for something, how about waiting while pursuing. Idleness is not a virtue. A woman of virtue is commended in the Proverbs for not being idle.

In Ecclesiastes 10:18, it says "If a man is lazy the rafters sag; if his hands are idle the house leaks."

The Proverbs (6:9-11) also say,

"How long will you lie there, you sluggard?
When will you get up from your sleep?

A little sleep, a little slumber,
a little folding of the hands to rest-

and poverty will come on you like a bandit
and scarcity like an armed man."


I have a need of reform; I have a need to be desperate. I have a need to do more than wait for something to happen, but to pursue it. Life requires maintenance; idleness allows things to wear down and fall apart. A little sleep, a little slumber, won't make things better. In fact, poverty can come on you in a heartbeat if you're not watching out.

So Justin, wake up! Wake up!

Never

I must keep it short today. Honestly, I should probably be studying, but I just absolutely had to post a little something (we'll see how short I'll be able to keep it).

Also, as an introduction of sorts, a few weeks ago Hannah was telling me about a conversation with a friend of hers regarding the word never. The conversation was cautioning the use of the word never because as soon as you say never, you find that thing on your doorstep.

Like always, I commented on this conversation by playing devil's advocate, showing how saying never doesn't always imply it will happen.

And now I eat my words.

Wouldn't you know it, the one thing that is on my heart the most is the fact that the Lord loves people who say never (stick with me...). Just think about it. The apostle Paul was the never sort of person. He was the chief anti-Christian of his time, and he certainly would never go about preaching Jesus Christ crucified, let alone tolerate others who did so. He went from town to town arresting Christians and throwing them in prison, or at least he did until he met Jesus on the road to Damascus.

And then the man who never had any inclination of letting the message of the gospel of Jesus Christ spread became one of the most influential missionaries ever! And it started with a heart that said never.

Why would I be inclined to think that the Lord likes the heart that says never? Because when the Lord gets a hold of that heart, it becomes a heart wholly devoted to him.

Even Peter was the never sort of person. He swore that he would never desert the Lord Jesus, but he ended up denying that he even knew Jesus three times, just as the Lord said. After that, he went away broken, weeping bitterly. His never sort of heart that prided itself in his own dedication to the Lord was revealed, and this man who denied the Lord Jesus became the apostle used to establish the church.

After that, day in and day out, Peter and the other apostles went about preaching the scriptures and proclaiming Jesus Christ as Lord, this too from a man who said never.

And I find even now how in the past I thought I could never be free of this. Or how I could never be bold enough to do that. Or how I could never become the man I should be... the list could go on. But wouldn't you know, the Lord can bust through any kind of never and show how strong and faithful He is in any situation.

He has done so in my life, and keeps doing it. I find I've adamantly proclaimed that I'll never go back to a place again, or that I could never do this or that. But when the Lord gets hold of such a heart and sends them there, the will of self has to die in order to bend to the will of the Father. Then it is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives within me, and that's where I want to be.

So I don't think I mind people saying never. They just might find themselves face to face with the Lord Jesus, and find out how strong and faithful the Lord is in any situation.

Well, back to studying I go! I never thought I could finish a math major, but the Lord is seeing me through it. I will finish what I started.

The Impossibility of Coexistence

Wow, has it already been a week since I've sat down and blogged? Hmmm, suppose so.

Anyways....

I have a tragic flaw, or so I've been told. Apparently, I'm much too positive. According to some, even my complaining and whining is positive. How do I accomplish this? I have no idea, but I must be a pleasant complainer if that's the case.

All that to say, there is often a bright side to things. For example, spending less money on things you want in the now in order to save up money for things you want/need in the future is a great thing. Sure, in the moment it's tough and annoying. You don't get to buy as many things for you, or go out to eat whenever you want to, but the inconveniences in the now pay off in the future when you can make a down payment on a house, or (fill in the blank with a positive thing)...

So here's a wonderful thing I've discovered. In the past I always saw it in more of a negative light, but it's actually quite liberating.

I John 1:5-10 says this...
"5This is the message we have heard from him and declare to you: God is light; in him there is no darkness at all. 6If we claim to have fellowship with him yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live by the truth. 7But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin.

8If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. 9If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. 10If we claim we have not sinned, we make him out to be a liar and his word has no place in our lives."

In the past, this was always just a reminder of my abysmal failures and how short I come up in my pursuits of holiness. "God is light, but I mess up so much... my darkness is so great... how can I have fellowship with God..."

It wasn't like I didn't already know that sin separates man from the Lord, who is holy. If this was all this passage meant, it would just be condemnation; it would be further putting into my head the fact that I'm a failure. But here's the blessed truth. It's actually a battle-plan to protect your relationship with God.

"God is light; in him there is no darkness at all." Light reveals things; you can't see things without light. Darkness, on the other hand, is the absence of light; darkness is hidden from the light.

So to live in darkness doesn't mean you're not perfect; it means things are hidden. Maybe it's a hidden sin; maybe it's something we're trying to keep from the Lord so that He won't get his hands on it and change our plans; maybe it's a lack of honesty... but it comes down to something that is hidden from view of the one you claim to have a relationship with.

But this isn't condemning; it's liberating, because light and darkness can't exist at the same time. After all, darkness is defined as the absence of light. So if your bedroom isn't dark, it's because the lights are on. But the room is dark, it's because the lights are off (duh...). Which means, the way to eliminate the darkness is to turn the lights back on.

In the case of relationships, it's the same thing. When there are hidden things, however they may manifest, they will affect the relationship. You can't fellowship with God when things are in the dark; you can't fellowship with your fellow man when things remain in the dark. Sure, you can get along for a while and be OK, but eventually things will surface.

Take anger for example... If I harbor anger towards another without discussing it, it only takes time before I get so annoyed and fed up with them that it becomes obvious. It starts affecting my relationship with that person. I can no longer be as close to them because there is hidden anger between us.

The cure? Bringing it into the light and destroying it there.

And the maintenance of a relationship entails keeping things in the light. For Hannah and I, it means keeping clear lines of communication open. It means allowing her to have access to my life, and her allowing me access to hers.

With the Lord, it's the same. To claim fellowship with God means that I'm living in the light. Things aren't hidden. I'm not trying to deny Him access to a part of my life. I'm not trying to keep something out of His sight, lest He find out that I'm not perfect. Rather, the relationship and fellowship is made evident by the level of trust, exhibited by keeping things in the light.

So when we examine ourselves, and find there is "darkness" in a relationship, it's nice to remember... "If we claim to have fellowship with him yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live by the truth. But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin."

I'll confess; lately I've been living in the dark. In relationships with both humans and the Lord. But praise the Lord He has shown me (not through a preacher, not through a Christian living book by John Doe, but by sitting down with Him) that all there is to do is turn on the light and let things be revealed for what they are. Then the Lord will see to it that I am forgiven and cleansed, and my fellowship with Him will be restored.

And for human relationships, I need to keep the light on so that my fellowship with them can be true. Otherwise, I deceive myself and do not live by the truth.

Nicknames

Over the years I've acquired many nicknames. Most of them are stupid, and thus I blotted them from my memory. But some I held on to.

One of the most amazing nicknames I've ever had was bestowed upon me during my youth. That glorious nickname is simply, "Alpo." And just in case you're wondering, it is absolutely and entirely related to dog food.

You may be wondering if I was the kind of odd child who liked to steal away in a closet with a bunch of dog treats and just start snacking, but, alas, I was not. I've never wanted to try the stuff; I'm certain I don't have the taste buds for it.

Since I didn't obtain this "glorious" name by eating the stuff, let me tell you how I came by it. As a young one, say in fourth or fifth grade, I was a fast little squirt. I was fast enough to compete with many of the older kids in church games, and my only real competition my age in foot races was the twins: Keith and Kevin Badgett (man... they were fast!).

But for a small, nerdy child, I could kick it into gear and leave the competition trailing behind (or just leave them way behind). And the youth leaders one day asked the pivotal question: "What do your parents feed you, Alpo dog food?" From that day forward, I was dubbed "Alpo." (And for the record, my old friend Joseph Clayton was the one who made it stick. He was the 'creator' of Alpo in a sense.)

Now, as a 22 year-old student in Mathematics and the University of Tennessee, it means precious little to me. I've never met anyone else with the nickname "Alpo," so its uniqueness always meant something to me. But now, all the people who called me Alpo have pretty much filtered out of my life (or slowly getting there). But that's OK. I have a new nickname, and I think it's the greatest ever!

My favorite nickname was given to me by amazing girlfriend, Hannah. Every time she says it, my little heart leaps for joy. It's become special to me; more special than Alpo could ever be. That nickname is simply, "Dipwad."

How did it become so special? Heck, I'm not entirely too sure. The specifics are lost in the history books of time! However, I am certain I probably said something stupid; I probably took something she said and misinterpreted it badly, giving her a hard time as a loving joke. And then she said it! "Dipwad..." And then I lovingly responded, "Beautiful..." Then it stuck!

Sure, most people would find Dipwad to be somewhat of an insult to their intelligence. It might come across condescendingly, as if the other party were upset with you or thought less of you. But somehow in that moment, it was transformed into something else. And though it's kind of an odd nickname, and an odd ritual, we still have moments that begin with "Dipwad..." and end with "Beautiful..."

Quite frankly, I love it. I wouldn't trade it for anything. That's the fun things about relationships (in my humble but accurate opinion). The spontaneous little quips that arise, or the inside jokes from a silly little moment, that seem to last forever (or at least as long as you continue to enjoy it).

So I hope that everyone has little things like that, or that we can roll with situations and laugh a bit as we trek through life. Because I think we'd discover all sorts of little joys and laughs along the way to share with the ones we love, that make life all the more special and precious. I love to be my beautiful Hannah's "Dipwad," if for no other reason than it is something that is entirely ours.

Thus, I can't wait for the next time I stumble through a sentence, or stutter on the most common word in my vocabulary, because I know Hannah will be there. And I know she'll heckle me, and I'll first be offended. But she'll continue, and I'll break a smile. Then before I know it, we'll both be laughing and enjoying the moment together.

In short, praise God for relationships! Relationships with friends, family, significant others, ect... They're all great blessings from the Lord. I'm sure I don't appreciate them enough at times, or take the time to enjoy the company of others. But when I'm aware of it, I'm thankful for relationships. And I'm thankful for all the facets of them, nicknames and all.

The Consequences of Planning

I might as well face it; I'm not the most organized person. Each semester, I usually buy a planner, just in case. I try to use planners and calendars to organize my time and prioritize my tasks, but inevitably that never lasts too long. I have yet to resign myself to life without planners and calendars, but I've also yet to implement them. Oh well.

But even though I am among the worst at using such organizational tools, I still find myself to be dependent on having things planned out. For example....

When Hannah and I started dating, there was one time where I had planned out a date. I was going to take her out to eat at La Fiesta (only the best Mexican restaurant in Knoxville by far, and a personal favorite of ours... our church... seems pretty much like everyone we know loves it). After dinner, I had probably planned on watching a movie with her, or driving out to Sequoia Hills, I don't remember.

But I do remember talking to her at lunchtime that day, and her coworkers had invited her to go to El Charro's for lunch. Well, let's just say I wasn't happy. I had planned a date for her and it had been ruined. It's pretty safe to say I was flipping out over it.

Afterwards, I learned something. It would have been much easier to just pick another place to eat (Wow, revelation!!!). But unfortunately, I find myself to be the type to get stuck in a rut. I have something planned, and a change to it ruins the day for me. I failed to see outside of the great tragedy that had befallen me that day. But it would have been so much easier (for myself and for Hannah) to just go with it. It would have been much simpler and less stressful to write down a couple of other restaurants and pick one at random.

But that's not all folks! I am an even "better" planner than that!

One of my close friends, Bob Marlow, has been a great mentor/friend to me for many years since high school and afterwards. Even after graduation, we'd have lunch on a regular basis, enjoy conversation, and keep track of one another.

Starting last year, I began to find it more difficult to make time to see him with all my classes at UT. I never forget my friend Bob, but I don't keep up with him as I'd like to. In fact, I'm always planning on calling him... always meaning to see how he's doing... but I never find myself progressing past planning to do something.

On a good note, I finally called him yesterday. I enjoyed one thing he said; it was something like this... "well, just stop planning and do it."

If I'd adopt a mentality like that, perhaps I'd get more things done. If I stopped thinking about getting flowers for Hannah, and just went and got them, she'd have flowers on her desk right now. If I stopped thinking about my lack of time to keep up with friends, and instead made some time right then and there to call them (or meet them for coffee for an hour), I'd probably keep up with my friends better.

Here's a fun one. If I stopped thinking about sharing my faith, and shared it, someone would hear the good news of Jesus Christ. Or if I stopped thinking about my prayer life or time in the Word, and just started spending some time with Jesus, I would find myself spiritually nourished and growing (on a side note, you just can't grow if you aren't getting the right nutrients, or at least you won't grow at a normal healthy rate).

So I'm not saying "planning" is a bad thing. Organization is a great thing! Just think about it... Unorganized events are hectic and stressful. But by the same token, I find it to have some down sides if left unchecked. I'm still learning to be more flexible. I'm learning to stop thinking about it and just doing it. Basically, I'm learning to "let go and let God," to lose some of my control and be OK with it.

Never Too Late

Luke 15:11-31 (The Prodigal Son)

(the following is a website with this passage of scripture)

www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Luke%2015:11-31&version=31


As Jesus was teaching, he told the story of a father and his two sons. The younger son approached his father and demanded that he receive all of his inheritance. So the father did what he asked, dividing his estate between the two sons. When the younger son had gathered his possessions and wealth, he went into a far off country to squander everything he had in wild living.

After he had wasted everything he had, a severe famine came. He found himself out of money and out of friends; he found himself in need of a job so he could have enough money to stay alive. So he found the best job he could find at the time: feeding pigs. He was so poor that it says he longed to eat the pods that the pigs were eating. He had reached the point of desperation, willing to work with swine and would have gladly eaten with the swine if someone would have given him some pods to eat.

But then he came to his senses and said, “How many of my father’s hired servants have food to spare, and here I am starving to death!...” And so he left to go become a hired servant of his father that he too might have food to spare.

So here’s the point… If you know Jesus, or even if you don’t, and have run off to waste everything in wild living, you can come back. It doesn’t matter how low you’ve gone; it doesn’t matter what depths of sin you’ve found yourself in. The prodigal son demanded his inheritance while he was still young, and squandered every last bit of it. What happened to him when he returned to his father?

“But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him.” God just doesn’t wait for his children to come back; He watches. When He sees his children turning back to Him, he doesn’t prepare the “I told you so” lecture. He is filled with compassion at the returning of his lost sons. He runs out before they’ve even made it home just to throw His arms around them and kiss them because He loves us.

And we don’t have to worry about fixing ourselves to make ourselves worthy. The son admitted to his father “I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.” But the Father said, “Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet.” Only the Father can cover the mess we get ourselves in, and if we’d only return to Him He would do just that. All the dirt and grime that we’re covered in, He’ll not only cover us. He’ll put the best robe on us that he can find. But He’s the only one who can do it. If we could cover ourselves, we’d have no need to return to Him.

And don’t worry about fixing your reputation either. I’m sure the prodigal son had built up quite a lofty and unappealing reputation as a party animal, and as a rebel. But the son returned to His Father as a has-been, and he was soon covered not just with a robe, but a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet.

Remember, this son had demanded his inheritance from his father. To the younger son, his father’s only worth was the inheritance he would receive. Then the son wastes every last penny of it on worthless living… Could you imagine what that would feel like to be that father? That’s an unthinkable level of disrespect… that your son would want you only for the money you’d leave him when you die, and then every single bit of that is wasted. None of it was invested. There is literally nothing left of the inheritance you built up for your son because the son had no respect for you.

Even then, the Father’s response was “bring out the fattened calf and kill it. Let’s have a feast and celebrate. For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.” No matter how lost you find yourself, or how dead in sin you find yourself… whether you’ve ever been in a relationship with Jesus Christ or not… it is never too late. Is that surprising to us? It is never too late! As long as there is still life and breath in us, it is never too late to seek after the Father. The prodigal son had nothing left, only energy enough to find his way back home to beg for the chance to become a servant. Instead, he was robed and invited to a party in celebration of his return. It wasn’t too late for him.

Even a man on his last breath isn’t so lost as to be unable to find salvation. The thief on the cross was told by Jesus, “today you will be with me in paradise” because the thief believed in Jesus. The thief was being put to death for being a thieving murderer, and yet Jesus had forgiveness for even him. The thief’s death on the cross was nothing less than justice for his crimes, and he found himself on the doorstep of heaven.

It doesn’t matter where you’ve been or what you’ve done. None of that matters to Jesus. The only thing that matters is this… Will you come? Will you let Jesus see you coming from afar off and run out to meet you? Will you let Him cover you with His blood for your sins? That’s why He died, so that our sins may be forgiven. Will you let that robe of his blood cover everything you’ve ever done? If you repent and turn to Jesus, if you confess that He is Lord and that God raised Him from the dead, you will have eternal life.

Don’t let anything keep you from coming to Jesus; don’t be afraid. There are not words of condemnation. Jesus died so that we may be forgiven of our trespasses, and his response to our confession of our sins is “Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let’s have a feast and celebrate.”

But Jesus will not force his robe on you. He waits and watches, and when the lost come He will come out to meet you. No matter what you’ve done, he’ll come out to meet you. No matter what you’ve said, he’ll come out to meet you and put those things in the past.

Come to Jesus.

If You Love Me...

(John 14:15-31)

Jesus say in verse 15, "If you love me, you will obey what I command." Also in verse 21, "Whoever has my commands and obeys them, he is the one who loves me." Again in verse 23, "If anyone loves me, he will obey my teaching."

Conversely, verse 24 says, "He who does not love me will not obey my teachings."

Another way of saying this might be, "actions speak louder than words," but everyone has heard that before. It has become cliché, and thus, lost its power and potency. So let's try it again rephrased...

If you love Jesus you will obey what he says. If you don't love Jesus, you won't obey. It's that simple. "But I do love him," one might say. "He knows my heart," says another. But God says in Revelation 2:2 to the church in Ephesus "I know your deeds..." Again to the church in Thyatira (2:19), "I know your deeds..." To the church in Philadelphia (3:8), "I know your deeds..."Also, to the church in Laodicea (3:14), "I know your deeds..." Listen to what God says to the church in Sardis (3:3) "Remember, therefore, what you have received and heard; obey it, and repent."

To say that we can love Jesus without obeying Him is a lie. Obedience is the indicator of the love we have for God. So if we say we love Him, but our lifestyle is contrary to His teachings, we deceive ourselves. Look at what Jesus says in John 15:30-31.

"[The prince of this world] has no hold on me, but the world must learn that I love the Father and that I do exactly what my Father has commanded Me."

In other words, Jesus' crucifixion was drawing near. Neither the devil, nor the Pharisees, nor anyone (except the Father) had any hold on Jesus. Jesus wasn't controlled by fear of the devil or the Pharisees. They didn't hold any power over Jesus in the least. But even though it might seem to some that His crucifixion would mean He had been defeated by them, He did exactly what the Father had commanded. His obedience to the point of death on a cross revealed the love He had for his Father (as well as the love of the Father for us).

And it's not like Jesus' crucifixion made sense to the people. Jesus even explained things to His disciples and they didn't understand. The disciples knew He was the Messiah; they just didn't know or understand what He had come to do. Some thought he would overthrow the Roman Empire and establish an earthly kingdom, but Jesus said, "My kingdom is not of this world."

Despite that even his closest companions didn't understand that He had come to die as a ransom for many, He purposed to obey the Father and reveal the love He had for His Father. Obeying God is loving God. To disobey is to not love Him. Obedience to God doesn't need the approval of others. Others don't even have to understand why you're doing a certain thing; they don't need an explanation. They just need to know you're unwavering in your commitment to Jesus.

When it comes to obeying God, getting caught up in explaining things to people to make them understand will get you into trouble if you're looking for someone's approval. But don't let anyone have a hold on you. People need to see that those who love God must do exactly what He says, and nothing else.

What God says to the church in Sardis He says to us. "Remember, therefore, what you have received and heard; obey it, and repent." I am the guiltiest at times of needing others approval, or wanting them to understand why. But all there's left to do is obey, and walk in the freedom of loving Jesus by obeying Him.

Regarding my Current Music Selection

Well, my music selection consists entirely of songs that I love. Thus, it's my music selection. Sadly, I do not have all the songs I wish to have on here (they're simply unavailable... nonexistent... no, I'm not pouting...).

Nevertheless, the songs I do have on here mean a lot to me, so I figured I'd briefly write down a reason (or two) why they do.


1) Deeper - It's quite simple; it's an amazing song by an amazing band. And it's just like that old hymn, "I keep falling in love with Him, over and over, and over and over again..." Knowing the Lord is just that good.

2) Mighty is the Power of the Cross - The cross is the place I keep having to return to, remembering that I never earned my salvation, that I don't have to struggle to keep my standing with God. It was through the cross that I was set free and made clean through the blood of Jesus. So to me, the Power of the Cross is indeed Mighty; without it, there is no freedom.

3) All We Need - Here's a fun one. "All we need is [Jesus]." You wouldn't think I believe by the way I carry on and worry at times. But at the end of any circumstance, whether a financial situation, or friendship crisis, you name it, here's what I find. All I need is Jesus. He's more than enough for me. He will provide and take care of any need, any situation. Having Him is having everything I'll ever need.

4) Facedown - Sometimes, I'm just to slow to get on my knees, get on my face, and worship. This song serves as a reminder to me that God sits enthroned above the earth, and I am His servant. He is the King, and when I'm in the glory of the presence of the King, should I not fall facedown in reverence to the King of Kings and Lord of Lords? And what better way to acknowledge the glory of the King, than to not just think it, but fall before Him in worship.

5) Jesus Paid It All - Just like I mentioned earlier, it's amazing that the Lord paid it all in full. There's nothing left for me to do; there's nothing left for me to worry about. That is freedom.

6) Forever and Ever - This is just a fun song, with good truth. Everything I need I find in Jesus when I'm willing to surrender it all to Him. And remembering that "I am His, and He is mine" never gets old. And it won't get old; I'll have eternity to enjoy it.

7) Your Smiling Face - I just so happen to be the luckiest, or rather, the most blessed man I've ever ran into. And this is the song that always (always) puts a smile on my face, because the only thing I can think about is my Hannah. Yeah, we have our moments, but I'm never happier than when I'm with her. She's the greatest blessing I've ever had enter my life, and I love her. She's a treasure to me, and I sure couldn't make it without that smiling face of hers.

8) Never Gonna Be as Big as Jesus - Quite frankly, if ever I'm thinking too highly of myself, I should simply remember the greatest person ever humbled Himself to become a servant; He came to serve, not to be served. So I'll serve Him, the God Most High who humbled Himself even to the point of death on a cross. If that's what a "big" person does, how "big" do I really think I am?

9) Blessed - This is actually the wrong song title... it's a song called "Now that you're near" (or something equivalent). I love it because it say, "Now that you're near, everything is different; everything's so different." And different means good. After all, I'm being changed (or I should be being changed) into the image of Christ. Since He came to save me from my sin, I imagine this 'different' I keep experiencing will become something I love more and more. (note: being forged in the fires may lead to being burned, but at least I know the final product will be better, and it will be lasting)

10) When I think about the Lord - When I think about the Lord, and meditate on Him, what else could my response be but say "Hallelujah, thank you Jesus, Lord you're worthy! Of all the honor, all the glory, and all the praise!" Unless I'm being totally self-centered in the moment, that's the only reasonable conclusion, the only reasonable response. He's taking all my guilt, called me a 'Son of the Lord God Almighty,' thank you Jesus!


These are just some of the songs that mean much to me. I hope they bless you too.

"Take Off Your Hat Please"

Let me describe my day to you. I came home from school at two thirty; I hadn't eaten since eight this morning, so I began to feast upon my mother's homemade sourdough bread. My buttered bread was heated in the microwave for just a bit, giving it a fresh out of the oven kind of texture and warmth. And then, rather suddenly, the Lord spoke to me.

It was rather unexpected. He told me to take off my hat (this to a guy who doesn't take off his hat). I've never made a habit of taking off my hat. At the church I used to be plugged into, I would wear it through a whole service. Why? To me, it was just a hat. It wasn't respectful to take it off; it wasn't disrespectful to leave it on; it was a hat.

But nevertheless my Diamondbacks baseball cap came off, and I was reminded of 1 Corinthians 8:1-13. In that passage, the specific issue is eating food that had been sacrificed to idols; in my life, the issue is wearing a baseball cap. I've never been one to offend people by wearing my baseball cap. Rather, around others I'll always take it off for prayer, or try to refrain from wearing it at a gathering for the sake of others.

Let me be honest. I didn't do it for the well-being of others; I did it because I was supposed to, because it could offend someone, to keep me out of trouble. What I failed to see then, what I still have trouble seeing sometimes, is that the point has nothing to do with me; it has everything to do with the other brother or sister in Christ. To some, wearing a hat in a church, or in the Lord's presence in prayer, shows disrespect. Why? Honestly, I don't know; but I would love to know the reasoning behind taking off one's hat.

But nevertheless, my mindset should never be about showcasing my freedom in Christ in trivial things. "But food (or a hat) does not bring us near to God; we are no worse if we do not eat, and no better if we do. Be careful, however, that the exercise of your freedom does not become a stumbling block to the weak. For if anyone with a weak conscience sees you who have this knowledge (that food does not make one better or worse to God) eating in an idol's temple, won't he be emboldened to eat what has been sacrificed to idols? So this weak brother, for whom Christ died, is destroyed by your knowledge. When you sin against your brothers in this way and wound their weak conscience, you sin against Christ. Therefore, if what I eat causes my brother to fall into sin, I will never eat meat again, so that I will not cause him to fall." (1 Cor 8:8-13)

In other words... if you eat food that has been sacrificed to idols, and another eats it without first having the faith to do so, you sin against your brother/sister and against Christ. It does not matter if you had the freedom to or not; if your brother/sister is not acting out of faith, they are not being built up in the faith; rather, they are being destroyed.

Or, in the case of wearing a hat during prayer, if one doesn't take their hat off in faith that it does not disrespect the Lord, they are not acting in freedom; they are searing their conscience. They are acting contrary to what they believe is the right thing. After all, "... the man who has doubts is condemned if he eats, because his eating is not from faith; and everything that does not come from faith is sin." (Romans 14:23)

And this should be our mindset: "Nobody should seek his own good, but the good of others." (1 Cor 10:24)

Likewise, "If your brother is distressed because of what you eat, you are no longer acting in love." (Romans 14:15)

Oh that I would act in love more; that I would think of others more highly than myself; that I would be okay to lay down what I want to, or even what I am free to, all for the sake of love for another. That is the example of Christ of which Paul spoke of (1 Cor 11:1), that Christ laid aside all his heavenly glories and rights in order to do the will of the Father. Jesus sought not to do his own will, but to give His life as a ransom for many, so that they may be saved.

Can we do that? That's where the battle begins: dying to ourselves so that others may be edified and others may be saved.

Welcome, Me (and you too)!

Hello! You are reading the first post of my first blog ever, and I'd like to start by welcoming both you and myself to this new experience for me called blogging. I'll go ahead and admit it; I'm not a great writer. In fact, you may find that I make all sorts of grammatical and spelling errors (or simply that I may use the wrong word in the wrong context). In such a case, laugh at me, or correct me (or if you're an English major, get riled up and verbally berate me for my lack of education). In any case, however, I would love to see you come back and visit. It'd be dreadfully boring to blog for my eyes only.